Today has been a whirlwind– a true test.
On a small scale– it was tough. It began with a sick kiddo coming in an hour before I had to be up. By the time I got him situated, I wasn’t able to get back to sleep and brain fog consumed my morning. I was grateful that I wasn’t hungover– even the most severe sleep deprived brain fog has nothing on the dreaded hangover.
Work was dismal. I spent the majority of my morning in a meeting with the grandmother of a new student I was about to get. Grandma gave an extensive history of the child’s sad upbringing and I was left wondering how I was going to help this 7 year focus on academic skills when she was dealing with a horrid home life.
On a large scale, the day was serious. Luckily, my afternoon meeting was much better. It was for a student who has made great growth and with parents who cannot be nicer or more supportive. Early into the meeting I saw a text from my dad come through. “Call me when you get out of work.”
This type of text always makes me uneasy. I knew my dad has been having lung/breathing issues and is supposed to see a lung specialist tomorrow. My mind wandered throughout the meeting… did he have to go in early– was he at the hospital– did something happen to my grandma??? It took real effort to focus on the meeting that I had to facilitate.
When I called my dad, my fears were confirmed. My uncle, an officer, was hit by a college student while helping at the scene of an accident. He was in ICU with an extensive brain injury and the next few days will be critical.
I was dazed. I went on with the end of my day, going through the motions, acting as though everything was ok. I picked up my dog from daycare on the way home. When they brought him out, they used a different door so I didn’t even notice him. When I looked at him, I didn’t recognize him right away. I felt like the biggest ditz! While I was waiting for him I pulled the article about my uncle up on my phone and was immersed in the story. I wanted to tell the girl why I was zoned out but the point was moot.
I turned on the news after I got home and news of my uncle was the leading story. It hit home then. Since then just misery– sitting here with my feelings. This is it– feeling the feels– life on life’s term. Betsy has been chirping in my ear since the ride home. I have just started humoring her– and that’s why I’m writing this. Getting these thoughts out helps me cope. I’d like nothing but a stiff drink right now and to numb out.
This has been challenging and I’ve felt more anxiety today than I’ve ever felt sober. Taking it one moment at a time– I surely don’t want to wake up head sick, hungover, anxious and full of guilt and shame.
Extra prayers appreciated for my uncle, his wife and his teenage twins ❤
Blessings and Peace to you and your family.
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Thank you so much 💜
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Sending you love and prayers.
That is a lot. I hope you get to bed early and that the news tomorrow is good.
Hugs
Anne
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Thank you so much 💜. Trying to wind down but kind of afraid to wake up 😒
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Wow, what a day!! I’m sending you good vibes right now. ❤
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Thank you so much 💜
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Life is full of soo much. It brings us so much. I hate that somedays it just piles on. Every day I am reflecting on my day and finding one thing that I appreciated or made me smile. I’m going to continue this through the year. Your family and uncle are in my thoughts.
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Thank you so much Rose, and yes some days it just piles on! Excellent idea to make a conscious effort to think positively on a daily basis— I shall try this as well 💜
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I am so sorry about your uncle. Sending you thoughts during this time and for your family. I hope the tests for your dad go well as well.
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Thank you so much for the well wishes 💜
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Sending good Karma to you and your family. I am truly sorry for the struggle you are facing and that of you family. HOPE ❤
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Thank you so much Nisi! 💜
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Sending love and prayers your way, thank you for sharing this with us. We often take things for granted. Keep your head up!
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Thank you Tyler 💜
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Oh, I’m so sorry. Sending lots of positive thoughts and hoping for only good news.
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Thanks so much Lois 💜
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So terrible to hear what happened to your uncle! I’m sending prayers that he recovers well and you and your family can find moments of peace in this situation.
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Thanks so much Sarah 💜
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So sorry about the family struggle you had to go through. Hoping the best and sending positive vibes your way!
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Thank you so much Claire 💜
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Sending prayers to your uncle, and the family. What an awful thing to go through, considering he was trying to help. I wonder about the world today… I like the acronym of H O P E. I noted it down as I am sure it will come in handy.
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Thank you so much Sylvie 💜
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Definitely saying a prayer for your uncle. Praying for a miracle!
April | http://www.thebluehydrangeas.com
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Thank you Greta 💜
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I’m so sorry for your loss. I love the acronym for HOPE. It’s a great reminder when hope feels lost.
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Thank you Jill 💜
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Sending lots of prayers to you and you’re family. I’m sorry you and you’re family are going through such a difficult time.
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Thank you Krystal 💜
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